Legal Disclaimer
This site is intended for users above the age of 21. It may or may not contain profanity, vulgarity, indecency, propaganda, lewd images and descriptions, violence, distressing or disgusting photography, detailed instructions for producing chemical weapons of mass destruction, and/or other recipes for disaster. In other words, free speech.

In any case, you agree that any offense that you may take is your own responsibility, your own choice, and YOUR OWN DAMN PROBLEM. If you don't want to be offended, you really shouldn't spend much time surfing the web. Odds are, you won't find anything here to get upset about. But if you do, you agree not to freak out about it. Alternatively, you don't need to actually be visiting this site. It's really your decision to be here, so don't get annoyed if you see something you don't like. Of course, I'm a big fan of open communication, so please feel free to contact me with any questions or concerns you may have. All I ask is that you be civilized about it. :-)

Copyright Notice
Okay. I'm not going to bust your chops here, but I've had some... shall we say "not so happy" things happen to my work in the past. So here's the scoop:

You're welcome to view download, play, watch, listen, do the hokey-pokey with and generally experience any and all public aspects of this website, for personal use only. You may NOT use anything contained within this website for any form of commercial gain. You may NOT distribute or publicly display or exhibit any materials contained within this website without my written permission. No part of this website may be uploaded anywhere else or posted to any other website or service without my written permission. You may NOT duplicate any part of this website in ANY WAY without express written consent from myself. In other words, all you have to do is ask.

You recognize that any breach of these terms constitute a violation of my copyright or may irrevocably harm me, and that I reserve the right to sue you, your friends, family, business associates, cohorts, goons, and anyone you've ever met into financial oblivion, in an attempt to make things right.

But... can't we just be friends?

Data-Mining and Privacy Policy
I like to choose who has access to and under what circumstances my content is distributed. You agree not to spider this site for data that will be shared, sold, or placed in a directory in any way, shape or form without my express, written permission.

There is only ONE form of spidering that is excepted from this policy, and that is search engine traffic. However, search engine spidering is only exempt if it results in a direct link to this site. NO data from this site, including names, contact information, photography or other images, or other content may be duplicated or distributed in any form. In addition, if my information and/or content is stored within a search engine, it must not be searchable by other search engines. If you duplicate this information, you, on behalf of yourself and your organization, partnership, company or other relationship, agree to pay me not less than $10,000 USD per domain name that utilizes such content or information.

In other words, if you or your company makes your money by reselling, renting, or otherwise charging for access to personal information/content or including access to it as part of another arrangement involving a financial gain for you, I don't want to be in your directory.

Anti-Spam Policy
I hate spam. I mean; I really abhor it. I don't have a problem with legitimate commercial marketing communication via e-mail, but there are some real bastards out there who think it's their right to bother you with anything that strikes their fancy, even when you specifically instruct them not to. I've even registered a special domain name to make it even more clear to them... but to no avail. You'd think if you told someone that your address was "123 Don't Come Visit Me Street", they'd probably get the picture. Apparently not. Uh… guys? mail@donotsendmespam.com? Hello?

So, I will attempt to clarify further:

I do not wish to receive any marketing offers, commercial endeavors, sweepstakes, contests, service offerings, or any other form of unsolicited e-mail from you, or any entity that you are affiliated with. If you send anything remotely of the sort, I will have not choice but to resort to the following measures:

1. Contact your web and/or email hosting provider(s) and have your servers shut down.
2. Contact your domain name registrar and insist that they seize your domain name, in accordance with their policies and procedures.
3. Get in touch with any other service providers, organizations, partners, clients, customers, or any other related entities that you may be doing business with and inform them of your illegal actions.

I live, work and maintain mail servers in San Francisco, California, U.S.A., which is governed by local, state and federal legislation for this sort of thing. Maintain no illusions; I will report you to the proper authorities. (i.e. local police for penal code violations, state and federal attorneys general for business and public law violations.) By contacting me against my clearly communicated wishes, you are in violation of some (if not all) of the following statutes:

* California Business and Professions Code, Division 7, Part 3, Chapter 1, Article 1.8 (Restrictions On Unsolicited Commercial E-mail Advertisers)
* Public Law 108-187/S.877 (CAN-SPAM/Reduction in Distribution of Spam Act [eliminate unwanted sales e-mail])
* California Penal Code § 653m (Obscene, Threatening or Annoying Communications)
* California Penal Code § 51.9 (Sexual Harassment)
* California Penal Code § 646.9 (Harassment & Threats)

And finally, you agree to pay me $800.00 USD for every single item of communication that you send. (My published billing rate of $80.00 USD per hour, with a 10-hour minimum.) There are no refunds or recourse available to you. My time is valuable, and spending time to track down your IP address, get your contact info from WHOIS or one of your hosting providers just to get you to stop doing what I instructed you not to in the first place is not how I would like to spend my day, period.

Spammers: Don't ignore this; I will go after you. Let me clarify further: I don't just report spammers because they annoy me; shutting down spammers is a hobby. I've got seven under my belt so far, and you'll be number eight if you send me any spam. Your career has become a federal crime. Be smart: find a new one. In the meantime, don't spam me, or I'll do everything in my power to make sure you stop, and that you get what you deserve. If that means destroying your business, reputation and financial standing via legal means, so be it. Alternatively, you could just play nice and not spam me. The choice is yours.